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The Hell In All I Held Too Close

by Take Breath

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1.
Sleep 03:07
Sleep won’t bring me peace I still feel you as I dream Whatever will be, will be But I fear this will only destroy me I cannot breathe for you Though I’d try if you asked me to Under light that casts no shade As you flicker and fade away Safe in solace It’s quieter in my mind Safe in paradigm We’ll reunite with time It sinks through my skin To know we can’t begin again There was heaven in all that I let go And hell in all I held too close So I need you to hear me Can you see how I feel it? The ache and the burn of losing you to sleep The empty space between the pen and the page The grief in my head I will bear til my grave
2.
Exhume Me 04:35
You’re all just skeletons with saccharine voices Regurgitating sentiments from eating corpses Dead eyes and silhouette skin Masquerading as living things Dressed up as secrets that we couldn’t hope to keep I loved you at your darkest, and still you turned to leave Now this heart that once so boldly adorned my sleeve Just drags behind me on a tattered leash This love was buried by our coffin nail tongues But we didn’t need to see it die so young I’d do anything to see this all preserved Even if it hurts I set fire to keep you safe, as I promised I would Now I’m measured by my failures, love misunderstood “Until the end, my sweetest friend” All the kinder things you said But those words die in your throat Like that love of mine you stole This love was buried by our coffin nail tongues But we didn’t need to see it die so young I’d do anything to keep this all preserved Even if it hurts I’m begging for mercy Exhume me from this grave we dug my strength alone is Not enough to lift the weight of punishment This hell I live Will not relent this swift descent is all That’s left for Me to feel since you spun your heels and turned This is all you'll ever be (a memory) just forgotten This is all we’ll ever be (unhappy) and unforgiving Through clenched teeth and tears you choked, It’s not making me happy, anymore Happy, you never were You couldn’t cut a smile out of her
3.
Young at heart and out of luck, I built a ladder with broken rungs Made the best of what I have, heather fields and idle hands Searched for hope in the smallest veins, a ray of light in the darkest grey Stood with those who’ll stand by me, promises I’ll always keep Kiss the sky, I’ve been reborn In the light that shines in every morn It never comes too soon, or brings too long a day I no longer wish the night had stripped my life away I will be there, by your side Once my torment has run dry Young at heart and out of luck, I built a ladder with broken rungs Made the best of what I have, heather fields and idle hands Searched for hope in the smallest veins, a ray of light in the darkest grey Stood with those who’ll stand by me, promises I’ll always keep Kiss the sky, I’ve been reborn In the light that shines in every morn Despite these wounds, love remains To be continued in my name Where I had lived before, I died again And life has found a way At least for now I’m satisfied, I think I’m happy to be alive
4.
Live Without 04:01
On the precipice Of ignorance and bliss I found not only you But, nothing to hold onto The trials of these times Bear nothing to future light I pray that you come down And speak to me now Where were you on the longest nights? Where were you when I found these hands were mine? If faith is just a metaphor for what I live without Deep into the ground (Abandoned in those circles just too far to be found I’ll rest my head here forever, neither sight nor sound) I’m not afraid to die or leave this sorry world behind Only to think that when I go It’s you who’s there to greet me, with worn and tired hope That I had found peace in you, and comfort in old bones I’ve buried it all so deep Repression manifesting in my dreams The haunt remains perpetually Persistent in reminding me And I still feel it in the wake Of all the things you didn’t say The catalyst for the collapse Of love you toll without romance If all of this is fleeting, I pray that it leaves scars To serve as a reminder of who we think we are (Where were you, where were you?) Once more, no room for kinder words From cradle to the grave, the human curse This stubborn skin, forged by time and ice A frost that won’t be thawed by glory nor light If all of this is fleeting, I pray that it leaves scars To serve as a reminder of who we think we are

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released December 11, 2020

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Take Breath England, UK

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